EXPECTATIONS
Sometimes my kids had big expectations. “Settle down, kids! It’s time to go to sleep.”
I remember saying that so many times when my children were young. They would go to bed and then proceed to talk and giggle, etc. We wondered if they would ever settle down. Finally they fell asleep, and the house became quiet and still. My husband and I looked forward to this time when we could relax and talk or read something together.
Often I felt like I could never sit down, because when I did, that’s when one or more of my kids would need something. If I was standing up or semi-busy, they were most often occupied, but the minute I sat down…
Of course when I made sure to give my children plenty of attention each day, everyone was in a better mood. Often that’s all it takes to help them settle down when they are wildly running around the house. Children are emotional creatures and they need to be reassured often how much they are loved.
Our homes should be places we are the most settled, where we can be ourselves, but often they become places of uncertainty, dissatisfaction and bickering with those we love most. We are quick to find fault, but stingy with compliments.
Often our expectations of one another are too high.
Maybe we are tired, sick, or uncomfortable, and we take it out on the ones who are closest to us. Or we have a certain way of doing things and our spouses do it differently. These really shouldn’t be cause for contention, but so often they are.
More times than I care to admit, I know I’ve been guilty of finding fault, complaining and generally making the home atmosphere unpleasant and unsettling.
I feel overwhelmed sometimes, like I’m being pulled in many directions. I become irritable and take it out on those around me. I’m not very settled! On my own I can easily become stuck in a downward spiral of feeling sorry for myself, thinking I might as well give up. My expectations of myself are often too high thinking I have to do it all. Everything is too hard.
But nothing is too hard for God.
In Jeremiah 32:27 we read these words:
I am the Lord, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me?
Also Jesus says in Matthew 11:28-30:
Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take up my yoke and learn from me, because I am lowly and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
Circumstances may not always change. Things aren’t always settled, but there is a way to find peace in the midst of chaos. I remember all the times in the past when God has taken care of me. He is gentle and forgiving and has promised to be with me giving grace and strength. When I find peace in Him my mind is quieted and I am better able to face the situation at hand.
LEARN TO BE CONTENT
I may not ever be completely settled in my life here on earth, but that is not a bad thing, if it keeps my eyes on my Savior who will one day take me to a place where I will be settled forever. Until that time I can learn to be content with who I am and what I do, which might include changing some of my expectations.
I can be discovering new things, seeking beauty, looking for the good in every circumstance. Also, I can love my fellow humans as I settle into the person I am meant to be.
I want to enjoy my life and encourage those around me in the process. I will make mistakes, and my attitude may not always be the best, but I will try. With God’s help I can reach for my dreams. You can, too!
Today I am linking up with Inspire Me Monday, #MondayofManyBlessings, #RaRaLinkup, #TestimonyTuesday, #TellHisStory
*I published an earlier version of this post on my former blog in February, 2016. I originally wrote it for #WholeMama where the prompt was the word settle, and #RealTalkTuesday where the prompt was expectations.
Great post!
I loved when you said, “I may not ever be completely settled in my life here on earth, but that is not a bad thing if it keeps my eyes on my Savior who will one day take me to a place where I will be settled forever. Until that time I can learn to be content with who I am and what I do, which might include changing some of my expectations. ” Very encouraging.
I also liked your reminder that we can have too high expectations for ourselves, but we have a God who can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens us.
I leave here today feeling edified! 🙂
Thank you for your encouraging comments, Karen! Thank you for visiting and I’m glad you were blessed and encouraged. It’s sometimes hard to lower our expectations, but we simply cannot do everything. May God give us wisdom to know what to do and strength to follow His leading. Blessings to you!
Good stuff, Gayle! This is just what I was reminded of today and this confirms His truth. I was overwhelmed by the circumstances of the day and snapped at those I love. As I drove away, tears stung my eyes and I was sorry for my words spoken. As I turned on praise music and looked toward the sky I was reminded of His love and faithfulness. In the crazy of life I need to remember His love. Thank you for these words. Stopping by from Inspire me Monday.
Thank you, Rachel. I’m glad you visited today. Yes, we all need to remember His love when life gets crazy. It’s hard, sometimes, isn’t it? It’s great that when we praise God even as we listen to music and see the sky, He reminds us that He cares and loves and forgives. Blessings to you!
I love this… We have intentionally cultivated our house to be a house of peace. (Of course – there are moments… but overall that has been our goal and people say that they can feel it when they first walk in the door! But more than our home… it’s our hearts that needs to house peace!
Your home sounds wonderful, Karrilee! Every house has moments….. Yes, if our hearts are at peace our homes will follow. Thanks for visiting! Blessings to you!
Guilty! Especially when I am making dinner and I have a little one year old wanting my attention. My poor husband : ( But I liked when you said “Until that time I can learn to be content with who I am and what I do, which might include changing some of my expectations” Dinner will get done. But the time I get to spend with her should be more important but also a time of grace to stop and chill. I have grown to love your posts, Gayl.
Oh, making dinner was always the hardest time… It was the end of the day and we were all tired and my patience was thin. I remember those days well. 🙂 But there is grace for that, too. Thank you so much for stopping by, and I’m so glad you enjoy my posts. 🙂 Many blessings to you!
That Matthew verse is such a comforting verse. Yes indeed we will make mistakes but God is with us along the way indeed.
Yes, I believe it’s one of my favorites in the Bible. I’m so thankful God is always with us wherever we are. Blessings to you, sweet Tara! xo
I want to enjoy my life and encourage those around me in the process. Mistakes will be made, and my attitude will not always be the best, but with God’s help I can reach for my dreams and so can you.
ME TOO, GAYL!!!
Thanks for being here, Susan! Blessings to you! xo
Great reminder that nothing is too hard for God. I love that we can find peace in Him even when circumstances are unsettled and I agree, it’s often the feeling of being unsettled that reminds us to turn to Him.
Thanks for visiting, Carly! I need the reminder often that even though things may be hard for me, God is still able. Blessings to you!
Finding peace in our own homes is valuable. Creating peace there for others is just as valuable too. Thanks for this reminder to keep my home a safe place for all who enter.
Thanks for stopping by, Lisa! I need the reminder myself, too. Blessings to you!
It’s taken me a long time to moderate my expectations (mostly that everyone else act perfectly but it’s ok for me to mess up :/).
It’s hard to moderate our expectations, isn’t it? But God will be with us and help us. Blessings to you, Anita!