Tears don’t usually come easy for me. I don’t always show the emotion, though sometimes tears well up in my eyes. Most of the time they disperse quickly and the feeling is gone. Sometimes they come pouring out but not for long.
I’ve told myself I have to be strong, so I brace myself and end up holding a lot of tension in my neck and shoulders. I also have a tendency to keep busy so that my mind doesn’t dwell on any one thing too long.
But things are changing….
Tears of Grief
As I get older I want to hold onto things more, especially since the death of my dear son, Stephen, near the end of 2019. The grief often hits me when I least expect it. Or it will hit me as I look at pictures of him or read his words. I am thankful that he is with the Lord, and we will see him again one day.
Through the hard things I’ve been through, God has given me a heart for people. It is easy for me to empathize with those who are suffering, for children and other vulnerable peoples. My heart is heavy for all the sorrow and grief and injustice I see in our world.
Walls Fall Down
Walls I erected in the past to insulate me from problems and experiences are falling down more and more. My heart is open to the heartache and longings of friends and family. I know my world has expanded because of the many friends I have made through online contacts.
My eyes have been opened to more of what others have to deal with that is not pretty. Even in my own family there are things I never thought would come about. But I know that God is still in control.
The counsel of the Lord stands forever, the plans of his heart from generation to generation.
Tears May Fall but God is With Me
God has called me to serve him right where I am as a wife, mother, grandmother, sister, aunt and friend. Also as a writer, artist, and musician, I can use my talents to bring joy and encouragement to others.
Sometimes it is hard to do what I know needs to be done. Other times I don’t know what needs to be done and find myself overwhelmed and unsure, holding back tears.
Sometimes I’m tempted to dwell on the unknowing and feel almost in despair, because I can’t see any answers. That’s when the tears may fall.
But I’m learning to wait, pray and trust God to work in His timing and His way. When I don’t sense His presence I know He is still with me, and He will guide.
God Sees Our Tears
When I don’t know how to pray or what to say, I know that God hears and knows my inmost thoughts and feelings. Even my tears are a prayer of lament.
He comforts me in a way that settles me as I wait on Him. There is a peace I find in the midst of the struggles, the sadness, the heartbreak.
Psalm 94:19 (CSB)
When I am filled with cares, your comfort brings me joy.
[bctt tweet=”I can go forward in confidence with grace knowing that my God is with me.” username=”GaylWright”]
The problems don’t go away, but if I turn and face them, maybe I’ll make progress and find my way through to the other side. Meeting the problems head on may bring lots of tears, but maybe that is what we need.
[bctt tweet=”Our hearts need to be softened. We/I need to love, to accept, to forgive as God has forgiven us.” username=”GaylWright”]
Tears and Hard Conversations
It is not easy to have hard conversations, to be real and authentic in our interactions with others. Maybe we are afraid of letting down our guard or allowing tears to come.
During these days of unrest in our land, which seem to come in waves, we NEED to have the hard conversations. I said seem to come in waves, but for our friends of color, it is an ongoing oppression that we can’t possibly understand.
(At the end of this post I will share some links to blogs of a couple of my precious black friends, who share from their own unique perspectives.)
The Color of Life
Another friend, Cara Meredith, published a book in 2019, entitled THE COLOR OF LIFE: A Journey Towards Love and Racial Justice. It is intended to help us start to have these hard conversations.
Cara, who is white, is married to the son of the black civil rights activist, James Meredith. Her book is part history, part memoir and tells part of her journey into the world of racial reconciliation. She also encourages us to see the image of God in every human being, as we are all created in His image, regardless of color or nationality.
GIVEAWAY HAS ENDED. MELISSA HENDERSON IS THE WINNER!!! CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!
I have an extra copy of Cara’s book to give to one of my readers. Just leave a comment on this blog. At the end of the giveaway I will randomly choose one winner. The giveaway will close at midnight on Wednesday, June 17, 2020. I will announce the winner on Thursday, June 18, 2020.
Marvia Davidson is a dear friend who writes to encourage, build up and give food for thought. I met her online but I met her in person a few years ago. She is a writer, singer, teacher and is passionate about encouraging others. Marvia blogs at A MARVELOUS LIGHT.
Cameron Robinson is a friend I met when he was in ministerial training at our church. He is a teacher, minister, photographer, and more. His blog is LEARNING BY FAITH: A Blog about Faith, Education and Culture. His wife, Joy, has also written an article on his blog that helps us see from her perspective entitled Better.
I hope you will take time to read these interesting and informative authors and share with your friends.
I pray that You would open our eyes and our ears to Your truth. May we see all human beings as they are – created in Your image. Hear our cries for help and take note of our tears. There are all kinds of problems in this world, but You, Lord, are bigger than all. May we look to You for wisdom and strength. Fill us with Your love and grace and may Your mercy cover us. Bring justice to our world and may all people realize that You are our Hope. May I show love to all that cross my path and may my life be a beacon of light to those in need.
In the name of Jesus, I pray,